2007-05-20 - 9:57 p.m.
JAKE THOUGHTS
Hello!
I said two months max and I'm coming in riiiiight under the wire. Whew! I bet you were worried there for a minute, huh?
Well, actually, I'm not here to continue my story from last time. But there's a good reason, I swear! Let me lay this piece of news on you: I am officially an uncle. Yes, indeed. It's true, it's true.
My sister-in-law has given birth to a happy, healthy baby boy. Well, he's healthy. I dunno if he's happy, I haven't met him yet. Maybe he's one of these pessimists. He's probably like "man, it's all downhill from here". Chin up, nephew.
Charity and I are off to see him on Tuesday and we'll be gone about a week or so. She was looking online for flights today and she calls me in all of a sudden going "ooooh, ooooh, look at this deal I found". It said we could get a round-trip flight for x amount of dollars, but for just $150 more we could get bumped up to first class. AND we'd get 60,000 frequent flyer miles.
I've never paid attention to flyer miles and that sort of thing, since I'm not a frequent flyer. But Charity showed me another part of the airline's site that said 25,000 miles would cover one round-trip ticket anywhere in the US. Thus, she tells me, 60,000 would essentially be two free round-trip tickets with 10,000 miles to spare, meaning we could go see our new nephew again in 6 months or something. Or, you know, we could go someplace fun, but we didn't get that far.
I was like wait a minute, beep beep beep. Beeping like a truck backing up, you see. I bought us plane tickets a few years ago for Spring break and it cost way more than $150 to get bumped up to first class. And you get 60,000 miles out of it, too? Something had to be up. And yet, as much as I'd like to be able to rag on Charity for misreading something, that was exactly what the screen seemed to be saying.
So she called the airline and, wouldn't you know it, you had to GIVE 60,000 frequent flyer miles in order to get that $150 deal for first class. Wah waaaaaah. It didn't say that anywhere, though. Perhaps it is assumed. Oh well.
It's all for the best. As much as I have lauded the many virtues of my sweetums on the pages of my purple diary, she's kind of a pain to travel with. She has what you might call a nervous bladder, so she has to pee about 3 or 4 times before we leave the house. Then she'll usually pee again either at the airport or on the plane. If we have a layover somewhere, she'll pee in that airport. And then she has to pee as soon as we get to wherever it is we're going. It's downright crazy. The fact that she drinks a gallon of water a day probably doesn't help, but she usually cuts back a day or two before we travel. Boy, she's going to love that I shared this with everyone.
She also always gets plane ears when we fly, where the cabin pressure makes your ears all clogged and stuff. It hurt when she was little, but now it's just more annoying than anything. It doesn't really happen to me, but she tells me that swallowing helps release the pressure, so you're supposed to take something like hard candy on the plane with you so you can have something to suck on to keep your mouth wet. Well, as you well know, I am nothing if not a solutions oriented guy. So if she needs something hard to suck on that’ll end up making her swallow, I had a suggestion for her. Werther's Originals!
Aren't Werther's Originals the best? I submit that they are. Remember the commercial back in the day with the old guy and his grandson? That was nice. So Charity went out and bought these ridiculously huge bags of Werther's for the plane. They must be 3 pound bags. I like them and all, but who possibly needs that many Werther's Originals? I mean, come on. Even Werther must think it's excessive.
Hmm, now that I'm thinking about it, she should get some of those lifesavers cream savers, too. Those are good. Do they still make 'em? I hope they do. I had some when they first came out and I don't think I've seen one since.
Anyway, that's all for now. I promise I'll finish that story next time. Really, I will. Honest. GET OFF MY BACK.
Hugs and kisses,
Jake
xoxo
